Today we will take a break from the facts, but do some quotes instead. I was thinking about some funny ones instead the touching and inspiring ones. So, prepare some tissues because you will laugh so hard.
Funny quotes that'll make you laugh so hard:
1. I’m going to stand outside. So if anyone asks, I am outstanding.
2. Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
3. I was standing in the park wondering why frisbees got bigger as they get closer. Then it hit me.
4. If you say you’re cooler than me… Does that make me hotter than you?
5. Mom, what’s it like to have the greatest daughter in the world?
I don’t know dear… You’ll have to ask grandma.
6. I dream of a better tomorrow… where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned
7. Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
8. Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
9. He who laughs last didn’t get it.
10.My teacher pointed at me with his ruler and said “at the end of this ruler is and idiot!” I got detention after I asked him which end he was referring to.
11. It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.
12. I have strong feeling about gun control. If there’s a gun around, I want to be controlling it.
13. A man’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another drink.
14. Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a tree that makes it a plant. Chocolate is salad.
15. Sometimes my mind wanders; other times it leaves completely.
16. What happens if you get scared half to death twice???
17. I’m one of those people that laughs at a joke 3 TIMES:
>>ONCE when it’s told to me
>>ONCE when it’s explained to me
and
>>ONCE 5 minutes later when i finally understand it
>>ONCE when it’s told to me
>>ONCE when it’s explained to me
and
>>ONCE 5 minutes later when i finally understand it
18. It’s better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you’re stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
19. Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
20. One possible reason that I don’t believe in fate is that I wasn’t fated to.
*laughs so hard from the quotes until chokes on the drink and got into hospital*
Just kidding everybody. I hope. Haha..anyways, hope this brightens up your day just like it brightens up mine. My personal favorite is #1, #4, #8, #17, and #18. #19 is just too sad. Why, you ask? Because if happiness happens when someone leaves, that means they dislike the person, make that really dislike the person very much. That's both funny and depressing at the same time. Geez..reading this makes my life better. Haha..nah. Anyways, that's the end of today's post.
I'll see you all tomorrow.
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